4. People think I talk to much, and I should shut up at times. They're right, but I don't care. People who knew me when I was young know how painfully shy I was and how hard it was for me to interact with people. I would take F's in school, so I didn't have to get up in front class and read a paper. I know how I was then, and I know how I am now. Yeah, I irritate people at times, but I will not be silent. I will never be that way again. Deal with it. I have.
Yeah, I'm kind of verbose, and tend to talk a little bit too much at times. Life goes on. When I was a kid, you couldn't have gotten me to talk. I was as shy as it's possible to be, and didn't think it would ever get better. Like most people, I had my moments, and could have a lot of fun and act up. But mostly I never did. Even at kids parties, I was the wallflower and wouldn't go talk to people I didn't know.
It was really bad in school, because it affected my grades. For some stupid reason, you have to do projects where you get up in front of the class and read it, or present it. That was a big problem for me, and I didn't like it. I would refuse to get up, or tell the teacher I hadn't done it, and take the failing grade. Failing was better than standing up in front of everyone.
There are a lot of reasons why I was like this, but I won't go into them. Mostly, it was a fear of failure or being laughed at. I don't know if that's the common reason, but it was mine. Suffice it to say, it was a problem. I would do anything I could to avoid being in front of a crowd. About the only thing where I didn't'have a problem with it was in sports. But I wasn't a good athlete, so it wasn't like I played a lot.
Of course, this didn't help when it came to meeting women. It was always a big problem, because I wouldn't approach a woman to ask her out. Now don't think I was entirely lonely all that time. I wasn't. I guess some women liked the shy act, even though it wasn't. It would just take the woman approaching me and then it was fine. If she was going to come talk to me, then she must have been interested.
This finally came to a head when I was stationed at Fort Campbell, Kentucky, during the time everything in Somalia kicked off. My job was going to require me to give presentations on the services we provided, and not just to soldiers. To the high-level commanders. And the spouses. If you've never had to brief a group of Army wives, you don't know what pressure is. You really don't.
I knew I had to get over it. To be clear, it wasn't fear of being up in front of a group of people. I had done that. It was being noticed by people I didn't know more than anything, and it wasn't fear, such as sweats and shaking and wanting to pass out. If I had to do it, I could. It just wasn't comfortable and I didn't like it. I always had the comfort level with people I knew, and think I was mostly okay socially in my own way. It was strangers I had a problem with. So now I was faced with a situation where I had to do it, and had no choice.
As luck would have it, I was fairly close to home, and would go back to Missouri on long weekends. I would stay with my good friend Layne, and we would hit every bar and party we could find. Layne is a performer (singer/actor/etc) and being the center of attention is his thing. Like Robin Williams, he is always performing. And I was the sidekick straight man.
So one night we went out, and Layne met up with a girl he was wanting to go out with, who was out with a friend of hers. We met up at the Legion dance (oh, the joys of small town living) and then went to Country Kitchen for breakfast. Layne, as usual, dominated the conversation and I kind of sat there. I figured these two pretty women weren't interested in anything I had to say, not while Layne was around. Eventually, one of them asked me something and I responded with a joke, or a one-liner or something, and they laughed.
Hey, good times. Further on through the evening, more questions to me, more funny lines, more laughter and all of a sudden I realized I could actually involve myself with people I didn't know, be funny, and the world didn't end. By the end of the night, I was carrying the conversation, the two girls were laughing and Layne was pissed because he wasn't the center of attention. He still hasn't gotten over it. That seems like a small breakthrough, but it was amazing. It showed me I could actually talk to people I didn't know and get up in front of people if I had to. I had a comfort level that I had never known before. It really was that simple.
So when it came time for the presentations, I aced them. I was funny, I was informative, I managed to deflect some tension from the subject and sent everyone home feeling better about what we could do for them. The Group Commander, who was in attendance, even sent me a hand-written note telling me how well I had done. Which was great, because it's not unusual to get a form letter with a signature, but this was an actual hand-written letter. I still have it.
Since then I've given countless presentations, attempted conversations in foreign languages, meet presidents and prime ministers, and have generally gotten over it. If I have to get up in front of a crowd now, it's no big deal. I'm still nervous about doing well, but not about being in front of people. I've actually helped write comedy shows for a friend, and have been asked to do stand-up routines by someone else. When it came to meetings, the people I worked for were confident enough to let me run the meetings with dignitaries. It's become easy.
However, on the flip side of things, now people think I tend to talk too much. Some people have told me that I never shut up, and I should back off a little more. They might be right. They probably are. It's hard to know where to draw the line between being involved or not involved. I don't think I have it figured out just yet. What I have figured out is that the way I am now is a lot more fun than the way I used to be. And I won't shut up, and I won't go back to the way it was. If people have a problem with that, they are more than free to tell me. They just have to realize I don't care.
Its not fun being that shy, and it isn't good for people to be that way. It can be lonely at times, and sometimes in a crowd of people. So people are going to have to deal with it. I've found my voice and I'm going to use it.
I refuse to be quiet any longer.
Friday, March 26, 2010
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Is this discrimination?
One of the things I had to do to get my residency visa was to take a Life in the UK test. It is a 20-question test about the history, politics, religion, local living, etc, of living here in the country.
The reason for the test, straight form the website:
1. The Making of the United Kingdom
2. A Changing Society
3. UK Today,: A Profile
4. How the United Kingdom is Governed
5. Everyday Needs
6. Employment
7. Knowing the Law
8. Sources of Help and Information
9. Building Better Communities
I got 24 or 25 right out of 25, so the test wasn't that hard. I did a lot of studying, read the study guide about a dozen times, and took about 30 practice tests. I guess it worked.
That's all well and good, but one of the things I wanted to bring up that I learned while studying the test:
In a country as obsessed with political correctness as the United Kingdom, I was surprised to see this. I mean, you can't look cross-eyed at someone here without a complaint being made, the government getting involved, celebrities marching against it, and overreactions that make a nuclear war look tame by comparison.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not advocating discrimination. Not in the least. It's wrong, and shouldn't be allowed. But I think this makes sense. In your own home, you should be able to do what you want (within reason and law). And that includes who you let into your own home. If you don't want someone in your house, you shouldn't have to let them in.
From the opposite side, this makes sense also. Why would you want to work for someone who obviously doesn't like you because of 'whatever'. If they are that irrational that your difference makes them uncomfortable, you wouldn't be happy working there. Might as well not even start.
What's funny, is that this wouldn't be allowed in the United States.You couldn't even have this on the books. There is no way the ALCU would allow this. They would rather force a person to accept someone into their home, even if causes problems.
So, while discrimination is, and should be, illegal, there is a measure of common sense allowed. So what are the opinions of the people reading? For, against, or no opinion?
The reason for the test, straight form the website:
A pass in the test fulfils the requirements for "sufficient knowledge of life in the United Kingdom" which were introduced for naturalisation on 1 November 2005 [1] and which were introduced for settlement on 2 April 2007 [2]. It simultaneously fulfils the language requirement by demonstrating "a sufficient knowledge" of the English language.So there are a lot of different questions, in the following categories:
1. The Making of the United Kingdom
2. A Changing Society
3. UK Today,: A Profile
4. How the United Kingdom is Governed
5. Everyday Needs
6. Employment
7. Knowing the Law
8. Sources of Help and Information
9. Building Better Communities
I got 24 or 25 right out of 25, so the test wasn't that hard. I did a lot of studying, read the study guide about a dozen times, and took about 30 practice tests. I guess it worked.
That's all well and good, but one of the things I wanted to bring up that I learned while studying the test:
The law also says that men and women who do the same job, or work of equal value, should receive equal pay. Almost all the laws protecting people at work apply equally to people doing part-time or full-time work.Now, that's all well and good. No issues there at all. It's a good idea, and the way things should be. This is what got my notice, however:
In a country as obsessed with political correctness as the United Kingdom, I was surprised to see this. I mean, you can't look cross-eyed at someone here without a complaint being made, the government getting involved, celebrities marching against it, and overreactions that make a nuclear war look tame by comparison.
There are, however, a small number of jobs where discrimination laws do not apply. For example, discrimination is not against the law when the job involves working for someone in their own home.Add in that fact that the UK is one of the most diversified countries in the world, and you wouldn't expect this kind of thing at all. Fortunately, they don't do the lawsuit thing here and sue everyone left and right, but they don't let it go. Its an amazing case of common sense in a world gone mad.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not advocating discrimination. Not in the least. It's wrong, and shouldn't be allowed. But I think this makes sense. In your own home, you should be able to do what you want (within reason and law). And that includes who you let into your own home. If you don't want someone in your house, you shouldn't have to let them in.
From the opposite side, this makes sense also. Why would you want to work for someone who obviously doesn't like you because of 'whatever'. If they are that irrational that your difference makes them uncomfortable, you wouldn't be happy working there. Might as well not even start.
What's funny, is that this wouldn't be allowed in the United States.You couldn't even have this on the books. There is no way the ALCU would allow this. They would rather force a person to accept someone into their home, even if causes problems.
So, while discrimination is, and should be, illegal, there is a measure of common sense allowed. So what are the opinions of the people reading? For, against, or no opinion?
Monday, March 22, 2010
I'm finally legal
I'm finally legal here. My passport came back on Friday with my Permanent Residence visa in it. To clarify, I've always been legal since I've been here, but it was a convoluted way of doing things. I will try to explain.
I came here originally under 'Rights of Access to a Child'. Pretty self-explanatory. Except the UK (and probably most countries) don't really have a category for this. It happens, but they don't know how to slot it into the visa system, and it doesn't have it's own category. So if falls under a tourist visa. Which is also different, because Americans don't need tourist visits to come to the U.K., and are only good for six months.
So, naturally, mine was for a year. Yeah, it's confusing. Try getting the paperwork done. But, even though it was a temporary tourist visa, it did allow me to work, get National Health, and generally be allowed to stay for a year. Pretty much everything except being eligible for 'Public Funds. You know, job benefits, housing benefits, welfare. All that stuff that I've never taken from any country I've ever lived in.
I don't know if that's for a trial period to make sure I really want to stay, or just because they don't know how to slot it. But that's how they do things. At 11 months in, I then had to apply for a new visit for permanent residency. That's basically a Green Card for those who aren't familiar with this, even though I don't really have a card. The fact that it cost £850 probably has something to do with having to apply for a new one.
It's a simple form, there really isn't much too, and it's pretty much a gimme. Send it in, wait a couple of months, and they send back the passport with the visa. I, however, always tend to over think things, and screwed up. I called the Home Office (Immigration) to ask them about the application, and see if there was anything I needed to do. I figured they are the experts, and could tell me what I needed to do to ensure it was done properly. So I did it exactly as I was told to by the experts.
The main thing that came from the conversation was that I needed to do a cover letter. And in that cover letter, I was told to add a sentence that stated after issuance of the visa, I would then be eligible for public funds. He told me that since my original visa said differently, I needed to add that in so that I would be eligible for all of that, if needed. So I wrote the cover letter and added that in. Also, during the hour-long conversation, he never mentioned that I needed to take an English literacy test. I figured since I am a native English speaker it wasn't needed. Yeah.
I sent the application in mid-May, and at the end of August, got a package back from immigration, and thought it would be the visa. It was my passport, but instead of a visa, it was a letter denying my visa and telling me I had to leave the country in 30 days, unless I appealed it. Needless to say, it wasn't the best day of my life. I wasn't a happy camper.
Someone sitting in a office somewhere, who processed the application, decided he didn't think I should get to stay. He stated the fact that I hadn't taken the literacy test as a reason that I shouldn't stay. But the kicker was, he stated the reason he declined the visa was because I declared that I was only there to live off of the government and use public funds. Granted, there is a big problem with benefit thieves in the country, but this one blew my mind.
He said the sentence I used in the cover letter (which I had been told to put in specifically by someone in immigration) was proof that I was only there to get benefits. He then, later in the letter, stated that since I had been perfectly happy to fly over every 3 months to visit Neeve, that I could continue to do the same after leaving the country. That was one of the most ridiculous statements I've ever encountered in my life, but he had the power, so it was all above board. In other words, I was screwed.
Of course, I could appeal it. Unfortunately, I was lost on all this and feeling like there was no hope, and wasn't sure how to go about it. Fortunately, good friend of the blog Neil had a friend who works for immigration. Neal called him and asked him for advice, which was to get with an agency that specifically handles immigration appeals. For £1000, of course. But Neal got me the number, and I called up and made an appointment.
Neal drove me up to London (Hounslow actually) for the appointment, where I sat around for hours, paid them a bunch of money, and handed them a packet of paperwork about six inches thick. They started the appeals process and told me they would get everything done, and not to worry about it. Which I most definitely was doing. They set me up another appointment for mid-September to come back to review the packet and sign it. As luck would have it, that was the same day my father flew into country, so I only had to make one trip.
The paperwork was done, and sent off to the appeals court for a date. It was scheduled for the beginning of October originally, so I made all the arrangements for it. It was in Newport, Wales, for some reason. So that was a train trip and a hotel up there to get this taken care of. I decided it was too expensive to stay in a hotel, and I didn't really have the money for it. Instead, I was going to take the early train up, get it done, and get home the same day.
Luck was with me for a change, as the day before, after I should have been on the train, I got a call telling me the court hearing had been postponed until the end of the month. Nice of them to be so prompt with the decision. At least I didn't waste a train ticket. At the end of the month, I did the same thing, and decided to go up early instead of staying overnight. To be honest, if I had stayed in a hotel, I would have spent the night drinking in the nearest pub, so it was probably a good decision.
When I got up to the court the day of the hearing and meet my lawyer, I realized the appeals service thought it was an easy case and they weren't too worried about it. Because they gave me the youngest, most-inexperienced, incompetent lawyer they had, and she did her best to lose the case. The judge basically had to lead her through and prompt her on what to say and what not to say. The immigration lawyer, to give him credit, was embarrassed by the entire thing.
He couldn't say anything for the record, because of the transcript, but let the judge and me both know that the immigration service thought the original denial was wrong and there was no basis to it. I had since taken the literacy test, and that wasn't an issue, so it was only the statement about public funds that was in question. Since (he told me later, off the record) that shouldn't have been a factor regardless, the immigration service wasn't going to fight the appeal. So the decision was in my favor. Hooray, me!!!!
By law, however the ruling goes, the other party has a right to appeal the decisions within 5 days. After 5 days, they had not done so, and sent me a letter saying I would receive a letter telling me where to send my passport for the issuance of the visa. Two months later, I still hadn't received the letter. So I called the appeals service to ask what the problem was. They informed that my appeal was finished, I was no longer a client, and if I wanted them to do anything, I would have to pay another £1000. After a brief conversation with me, they changed their mind and called the immigration service.
I then received a letter telling me to send off my passport, and that I would have it back within 10 days. Nope, didn't happen. So I called the appeals service again, had the same conversations with them, and was finally informed that I would have my visa within 10 days. The 10th day would have been last Friday. Amazingly, my passport and visa arrived. I am now legal. I am an immigrant.
By the way, one of the reasons my application was originally denied was due to the fact that I hadn't taken the literacy test to prove that I can speak, read, and write English to an acceptable level. At the court hearing for the appeal, I was offered an interpreter in case I couldn't speak English at an adequate level.
Yeah, I wanted to be a smart ass. I was just too worried about the outcome to do it.
I came here originally under 'Rights of Access to a Child'. Pretty self-explanatory. Except the UK (and probably most countries) don't really have a category for this. It happens, but they don't know how to slot it into the visa system, and it doesn't have it's own category. So if falls under a tourist visa. Which is also different, because Americans don't need tourist visits to come to the U.K., and are only good for six months.
So, naturally, mine was for a year. Yeah, it's confusing. Try getting the paperwork done. But, even though it was a temporary tourist visa, it did allow me to work, get National Health, and generally be allowed to stay for a year. Pretty much everything except being eligible for 'Public Funds. You know, job benefits, housing benefits, welfare. All that stuff that I've never taken from any country I've ever lived in.
I don't know if that's for a trial period to make sure I really want to stay, or just because they don't know how to slot it. But that's how they do things. At 11 months in, I then had to apply for a new visit for permanent residency. That's basically a Green Card for those who aren't familiar with this, even though I don't really have a card. The fact that it cost £850 probably has something to do with having to apply for a new one.
It's a simple form, there really isn't much too, and it's pretty much a gimme. Send it in, wait a couple of months, and they send back the passport with the visa. I, however, always tend to over think things, and screwed up. I called the Home Office (Immigration) to ask them about the application, and see if there was anything I needed to do. I figured they are the experts, and could tell me what I needed to do to ensure it was done properly. So I did it exactly as I was told to by the experts.
The main thing that came from the conversation was that I needed to do a cover letter. And in that cover letter, I was told to add a sentence that stated after issuance of the visa, I would then be eligible for public funds. He told me that since my original visa said differently, I needed to add that in so that I would be eligible for all of that, if needed. So I wrote the cover letter and added that in. Also, during the hour-long conversation, he never mentioned that I needed to take an English literacy test. I figured since I am a native English speaker it wasn't needed. Yeah.
I sent the application in mid-May, and at the end of August, got a package back from immigration, and thought it would be the visa. It was my passport, but instead of a visa, it was a letter denying my visa and telling me I had to leave the country in 30 days, unless I appealed it. Needless to say, it wasn't the best day of my life. I wasn't a happy camper.
Someone sitting in a office somewhere, who processed the application, decided he didn't think I should get to stay. He stated the fact that I hadn't taken the literacy test as a reason that I shouldn't stay. But the kicker was, he stated the reason he declined the visa was because I declared that I was only there to live off of the government and use public funds. Granted, there is a big problem with benefit thieves in the country, but this one blew my mind.
He said the sentence I used in the cover letter (which I had been told to put in specifically by someone in immigration) was proof that I was only there to get benefits. He then, later in the letter, stated that since I had been perfectly happy to fly over every 3 months to visit Neeve, that I could continue to do the same after leaving the country. That was one of the most ridiculous statements I've ever encountered in my life, but he had the power, so it was all above board. In other words, I was screwed.
Of course, I could appeal it. Unfortunately, I was lost on all this and feeling like there was no hope, and wasn't sure how to go about it. Fortunately, good friend of the blog Neil had a friend who works for immigration. Neal called him and asked him for advice, which was to get with an agency that specifically handles immigration appeals. For £1000, of course. But Neal got me the number, and I called up and made an appointment.
Neal drove me up to London (Hounslow actually) for the appointment, where I sat around for hours, paid them a bunch of money, and handed them a packet of paperwork about six inches thick. They started the appeals process and told me they would get everything done, and not to worry about it. Which I most definitely was doing. They set me up another appointment for mid-September to come back to review the packet and sign it. As luck would have it, that was the same day my father flew into country, so I only had to make one trip.
The paperwork was done, and sent off to the appeals court for a date. It was scheduled for the beginning of October originally, so I made all the arrangements for it. It was in Newport, Wales, for some reason. So that was a train trip and a hotel up there to get this taken care of. I decided it was too expensive to stay in a hotel, and I didn't really have the money for it. Instead, I was going to take the early train up, get it done, and get home the same day.
Luck was with me for a change, as the day before, after I should have been on the train, I got a call telling me the court hearing had been postponed until the end of the month. Nice of them to be so prompt with the decision. At least I didn't waste a train ticket. At the end of the month, I did the same thing, and decided to go up early instead of staying overnight. To be honest, if I had stayed in a hotel, I would have spent the night drinking in the nearest pub, so it was probably a good decision.
When I got up to the court the day of the hearing and meet my lawyer, I realized the appeals service thought it was an easy case and they weren't too worried about it. Because they gave me the youngest, most-inexperienced, incompetent lawyer they had, and she did her best to lose the case. The judge basically had to lead her through and prompt her on what to say and what not to say. The immigration lawyer, to give him credit, was embarrassed by the entire thing.
He couldn't say anything for the record, because of the transcript, but let the judge and me both know that the immigration service thought the original denial was wrong and there was no basis to it. I had since taken the literacy test, and that wasn't an issue, so it was only the statement about public funds that was in question. Since (he told me later, off the record) that shouldn't have been a factor regardless, the immigration service wasn't going to fight the appeal. So the decision was in my favor. Hooray, me!!!!
By law, however the ruling goes, the other party has a right to appeal the decisions within 5 days. After 5 days, they had not done so, and sent me a letter saying I would receive a letter telling me where to send my passport for the issuance of the visa. Two months later, I still hadn't received the letter. So I called the appeals service to ask what the problem was. They informed that my appeal was finished, I was no longer a client, and if I wanted them to do anything, I would have to pay another £1000. After a brief conversation with me, they changed their mind and called the immigration service.
I then received a letter telling me to send off my passport, and that I would have it back within 10 days. Nope, didn't happen. So I called the appeals service again, had the same conversations with them, and was finally informed that I would have my visa within 10 days. The 10th day would have been last Friday. Amazingly, my passport and visa arrived. I am now legal. I am an immigrant.
By the way, one of the reasons my application was originally denied was due to the fact that I hadn't taken the literacy test to prove that I can speak, read, and write English to an acceptable level. At the court hearing for the appeal, I was offered an interpreter in case I couldn't speak English at an adequate level.
Yeah, I wanted to be a smart ass. I was just too worried about the outcome to do it.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Back again
Okay, so I'm back to try this again. Over the last few months, I just haven't had the energy, or the time mostly, to do this. I've been working nights, and sleeping days, and trying to adjust. I've also moved into a new place, and getting that painted and cleaned and fixed up is time-consuming. On top of that, my father is visiting, and I've been spending time with him, so there just aren't enough hours in the day.
My father is still here, but will be leaving right after New Years. I'll be able to have more of a regular schedule then, and with the crappy weather, should be able to get back into this, at least on a semi-regular basis.
It's been great having him here, and he's been to see Neeve every time I've gone. They get along great, and she'll be sad to see him go. She talks to him a lot, and will play with him whenever they get the chance. He gets things out of her it took me months to get, but he's a grandparent, and I'm just Daddy. And I don't mind.
Things are great with Neeve. She's turned six, and doing great in school. We're getting along better than ever, and there aren't any issues between us. There is one, but I'll cover that separately.
Her mother and I have seemed to form some sort of symbiotic relationship at last. In that we both have to deal with the other, and we've learned to do it without making things more difficult for Neeve. More on that one later. But no arguments or silly games for quite awhile.
I'm working as a Night Porter in a hotel. I don't like it, but it's more money for fewer hours than I was making before. And better working conditions. I want to move into days, but it isn't happening right now. The main thing is, it's work. Steady work.
Those are the main things right now. There isn't much happening, as usual. But things to fill you in on. I'll try to get all things caught up by the end of the year. I still don't have a lot of time, but it's getting better.
Be back soon.
My father is still here, but will be leaving right after New Years. I'll be able to have more of a regular schedule then, and with the crappy weather, should be able to get back into this, at least on a semi-regular basis.
It's been great having him here, and he's been to see Neeve every time I've gone. They get along great, and she'll be sad to see him go. She talks to him a lot, and will play with him whenever they get the chance. He gets things out of her it took me months to get, but he's a grandparent, and I'm just Daddy. And I don't mind.
Things are great with Neeve. She's turned six, and doing great in school. We're getting along better than ever, and there aren't any issues between us. There is one, but I'll cover that separately.
Her mother and I have seemed to form some sort of symbiotic relationship at last. In that we both have to deal with the other, and we've learned to do it without making things more difficult for Neeve. More on that one later. But no arguments or silly games for quite awhile.
I'm working as a Night Porter in a hotel. I don't like it, but it's more money for fewer hours than I was making before. And better working conditions. I want to move into days, but it isn't happening right now. The main thing is, it's work. Steady work.
Those are the main things right now. There isn't much happening, as usual. But things to fill you in on. I'll try to get all things caught up by the end of the year. I still don't have a lot of time, but it's getting better.
Be back soon.
Friday, July 31, 2009
25 Random Things: # 3
3. Someday I will buy a tropical island in the South Pacific, move there and never leave. Special invitation only to visit, so be nice to me.
That would seem to be a fairly simple statement. Who wouldn't want to live on a tropical island in the South Pacific. The weather, the simplicity of the life style, the lack of stress and bother would be something most people want. I can be an obsessive-compulsive type of person at times, and can get a little Type-A when I need to. But I've worked hard all my adult life, and I also enjoy it taking it easy.
I'm not talking about some deserted, Gilligan's Island-type of place. But an island, none the less. Maybe the end of an island that has a town on it, for the basics of groceries and some socializing on occasion. I'm not anti-social, I just spend a lot of time by myself. But even better would be a small island all my own, but close enough by boat to get to another island with stores and civilization, when needed.
And not desolate, either. There would be electricity, or generators for power. I would still have my Internet connection so I can keep in touch with people, and my satellite television for watching baseball, news, and old movies. And a phone to make calls as wanted. And obviously, refrigeration for beer and steaks.
But can you imagine the lifestyle. You get up in the morning, and go for a swim. Check the trot line for fresh fish for breakfast, with some fresh fruit. Spend the day doing home improvement and gardening, or exploring the island. Maybe a sail boat for when the weather is nice. Or scuba diving. Time spent watching baseball and writing about it. I can see it. And in the evening, lying out on the beach with a cold beer watching the sun go down? Oh yeah, I can see it.
And I'm not looking to be lonely. People would be allowed to visit, of course. Especially family and certain other visitors. There would probably be a guest house for most of them. They could stay as long as they wanted, but not longer than 3 weeks. 3 weeks is the max. Except for Neeve. She can come live with me. That's actually the only drawback, is the time away from her. So this would have to be when she is older.
And of course, as stated in a later item, there is one person who can come and stay forever. And when I ask her, I know she'll say yes. I think. I'm pretty sure. Yeah, she will.
Anyhow, I can see this happening. I mentioned this to a few people, and they thought I was crazy. They said I would be bored. Maybe. They could be right. But right now I'm bored in Bournemouth. My way, I would be bored in paradise. Not hard to figure this one out.
That would seem to be a fairly simple statement. Who wouldn't want to live on a tropical island in the South Pacific. The weather, the simplicity of the life style, the lack of stress and bother would be something most people want. I can be an obsessive-compulsive type of person at times, and can get a little Type-A when I need to. But I've worked hard all my adult life, and I also enjoy it taking it easy.
I'm not talking about some deserted, Gilligan's Island-type of place. But an island, none the less. Maybe the end of an island that has a town on it, for the basics of groceries and some socializing on occasion. I'm not anti-social, I just spend a lot of time by myself. But even better would be a small island all my own, but close enough by boat to get to another island with stores and civilization, when needed.
And not desolate, either. There would be electricity, or generators for power. I would still have my Internet connection so I can keep in touch with people, and my satellite television for watching baseball, news, and old movies. And a phone to make calls as wanted. And obviously, refrigeration for beer and steaks.
But can you imagine the lifestyle. You get up in the morning, and go for a swim. Check the trot line for fresh fish for breakfast, with some fresh fruit. Spend the day doing home improvement and gardening, or exploring the island. Maybe a sail boat for when the weather is nice. Or scuba diving. Time spent watching baseball and writing about it. I can see it. And in the evening, lying out on the beach with a cold beer watching the sun go down? Oh yeah, I can see it.
And I'm not looking to be lonely. People would be allowed to visit, of course. Especially family and certain other visitors. There would probably be a guest house for most of them. They could stay as long as they wanted, but not longer than 3 weeks. 3 weeks is the max. Except for Neeve. She can come live with me. That's actually the only drawback, is the time away from her. So this would have to be when she is older.
And of course, as stated in a later item, there is one person who can come and stay forever. And when I ask her, I know she'll say yes. I think. I'm pretty sure. Yeah, she will.
Anyhow, I can see this happening. I mentioned this to a few people, and they thought I was crazy. They said I would be bored. Maybe. They could be right. But right now I'm bored in Bournemouth. My way, I would be bored in paradise. Not hard to figure this one out.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Are English people polite?
This is another mini-poll I found that asks the question:
England is widely known as one of the most polite nations in Europe, yet the English themselves often complain about a lack of politeness in their country in recent years. Compared with the situation a decade ago, how do you feel about the issue?
We are as polite as we have always been........................7%
We are not as polite as we used to be and I wish
we could return to the previous standard......................67%
We are not as polite as we used to be but we are
still sufficiently polite; there is no need to change... .....12%
We are more polite than we used to be...........................1%
We have never been an especially polite nation..............7%
I don't know...................................................................7%
As I've said many times before, I'm not here to bash the English. That's stupid. But having lived here, and been around English people for a long time, I can freely admit that most of them do feel that they are very polite.
At least to each other. But when it comes to foreigners, it doesn't always come across that way. We all know about the stereotypes of the French, the Germans, the Russians, New Yorkers, etc. Everyone can be characterized as something without it necessarily being true.
What I've experienced at times with the English is that they can be extremely rude at times. The difference is, they just don't realize they're doing it. If you would try to explain to them how they were rude, they wouldn't believe it. And would be offended at you for even suggesting it.
One of the great quotes I've ever read from a book, (and I can't remember who said it, but it wasn't me, I'm not taking credit) was about the English. In the book, the character says,
"You can have a conversation with an English person and remark how polite and respectful they are, and it isn't until 3 days later that you realize you've actually been insulted."
People here have treated me great, and some of my best friends I've ever had are English. But that quote is so true. But, much as they've learned to accept me as who I am, I've learned to accept them as they are.
After all, it's sticks and stones.
Thanks to Lightspeed Panel for the poll.
England is widely known as one of the most polite nations in Europe, yet the English themselves often complain about a lack of politeness in their country in recent years. Compared with the situation a decade ago, how do you feel about the issue?
We are as polite as we have always been........................7%
We are not as polite as we used to be and I wish
we could return to the previous standard......................67%
We are not as polite as we used to be but we are
still sufficiently polite; there is no need to change... .....12%
We are more polite than we used to be...........................1%
We have never been an especially polite nation..............7%
I don't know...................................................................7%
As I've said many times before, I'm not here to bash the English. That's stupid. But having lived here, and been around English people for a long time, I can freely admit that most of them do feel that they are very polite.
At least to each other. But when it comes to foreigners, it doesn't always come across that way. We all know about the stereotypes of the French, the Germans, the Russians, New Yorkers, etc. Everyone can be characterized as something without it necessarily being true.
What I've experienced at times with the English is that they can be extremely rude at times. The difference is, they just don't realize they're doing it. If you would try to explain to them how they were rude, they wouldn't believe it. And would be offended at you for even suggesting it.
One of the great quotes I've ever read from a book, (and I can't remember who said it, but it wasn't me, I'm not taking credit) was about the English. In the book, the character says,
"You can have a conversation with an English person and remark how polite and respectful they are, and it isn't until 3 days later that you realize you've actually been insulted."
People here have treated me great, and some of my best friends I've ever had are English. But that quote is so true. But, much as they've learned to accept me as who I am, I've learned to accept them as they are.
After all, it's sticks and stones.
Thanks to Lightspeed Panel for the poll.
Friday, May 29, 2009
25 Random Things - #2
2. I've been on television in six countries (United States, South Korea, Germany, Angola, Latvia, & Slovenia)
I’m not claiming any type of fame off of this. It’s more timing or circumstances than anything else. In the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t really mean anything, and I haven’t gone out of my way to be on television. In some cases, I’ve went out of my way to avoid it. I don’t care for the media, and think they are mostly hacks who sensationalize everything for ratings, and don’t really care about the real story. It was a couple of interviews, a couple of game shows, my own little ‘Band Stand’ moment, and just being where they needed someone at the time. Some long shots and just shots where I happened to be in the picture. Which also includes my great acting job. I’ll break them down by country.
United States:
The first time I was on television was back in 1975, when my mother won a slot on ‘Bowling for Dollars’. My two brothers, myself and a friend of my older brother went with her for the taping. It wasn’t that big of a deal. You stand up and they introduce the family members. It was taped, so I got to watch it at home when it aired.
When I got out of college, I moved to Rapid City, South Dakota, and got a job at the Hilton, in the banquet department. We would do some of the main events in town, and the news crews would come down at times to do interviews, or get shots, or whatever it is they do. I got to know them, mostly because there were only two channels in town at the time. They would do some extras at the end of the interview, like filming the buffet, or things like that. Every once in awhile, they would ask me to add a comment or make a remark about something. It was all silly, and pointless, but it happened several times.
This would lead to my big break later. More on that at the end.
I was on television a couple of other times in the states that actually kind of meant something. The first of those was at the end of Desert Storm. I got lucky and was on the first plane out and back to the states. We landed at Fort Stewart, Georgia. There was going to be a big ceremony, obviously, but not for me and the guys I was with. We were stationed at Fort Leonard Wood, Missouri, and had to catch a connecting flight. While they were getting everything set up, they decided to take us out the back door of the plane and get us out of the way so the ceremony could go on at the front door, for the soldiers stationed there.
We didn’t really care, we were just ready to go home. I was sitting by the back door, and when they opened it, I was the first one out because I was the closest. CNN thought that was the start of the ceremony, so they started filming. So I was the first soldier filmed landing back in the states after the fighting was over. I didn’t even know it. My aunt told me about it. She thought it was me, and a friend called and asked her about it, but she said it couldn’t be me, because I was still in Iraq. We hadn’t had a chance to call anyone and tell them we were on the way home. It was only a few weeks later that we figured out what happened.
The other time I was on television was when I was at Fort Campbell, Kentucky, during Somalia and Kosovo, and other operations. I volunteered to go to all of them, but they wouldn’t let me go. They said I was too valuable where I was at. Yeah, right. Anyhow, I was running the MARS station, which was a radio station/message center for the troops. We were able to do radio/phone patches so the troops could call home from overseas.
I’ll leave it at saying we did a lot of good work. If anyone is interested, give me your e-mail address and I’ll send you what happened. Anyhow, we started to get some publicity for what we were doing. We started on the back page of the weekly post paper, then started moving up page by page every week. Finally, I got a call one day from the Sergeant Major telling me to get to his office. He threw the paper and told me to explain myself. I was a little nervous until I looked at it and realized he was giving me crap. We were the top story on front page, above the fold. Pretty cool, if you ask me.
The next day, the Colonel ran into me picking up the distribution, called me into his office and showed me the front page of the Clarksville Leaf-Chronicle, where we were once again top story above the fold. In full color. We were all pretty happy and proud of ourselves. Then the next day, the Sergeant Major called down to the station and asked if we all had proper haircuts. I replied that we did, and asked why. He explained that one of the stations from Nashville had seen the story and was on the way up to interview us. Lead story, 6:00 news, and third on the 10:00 news. Let’s just say that everyone from the Post Commander on down was very happy with us. I still have a tape of the interview somewhere, and will need to get it transferred to CD. Neeve might want to see it someday.
Also, while stationed at Fort Lewis, Washington, I did some part-time security work for the Tacoma Dome, the Seattle Mariners, and a few other places. We would also be seen in the long shots, but enough that people would mention that they had seen me. Oddly, the most time I ever spent on television was 12 consecutive hours, at the Seattle International Speedway, working the start line for drag racing. I was on ESPN all day, and no one knew it was me. Mostly because I was wearing sunglasses and a ball cap, and they couldn't recognize me. Oh, well.
South Korea:
Germany should have been next, chronologically, but I wrote it like this originally, so it will stay. I was actually on television several times in South Korea, to include the Armed Forces Network and Korean television. The Koreans are very supportive of their military, and have game and talk shows geared exclusively to them. It’s kind of nice to see. They don’t just use the military to bump the ratings when something bad has happened, then turn around and shed a tear when public opinion is high. Anyhow, I was walking down the street in Seoul, and a television crew stopped me and asked if I would help them out. They were doing a segment where someone would say things in English, and the contestant would try and guess what the subject was. It wasn’t a big deal to me, and I like to support this kind of thing, so I said okay, not thinking much of it. It aired the next Sunday, and all of a sudden I was a huge star. Every Korean I met for 2 weeks told me they had seen me on television and how much they appreciated me supporting their military by doing that. Yeah, sure.
The other time I was on television in South Korea was on the Armed Forces Network. My roommate was ‘dating’ one of the girls who worked there, and she would come out with crews to do interviews and on the spot report type of things. Whenever she would see me, she would always get me in the shot, or get me to say something for the spot they were doing. Nothing big, but other people didn’t get to do it. People would actually come up to me and ask me if I worked for the Network, and if I could get them on camera. Yeah, don't think so.
Germany:
There wasn’t much to it in Germany. I was just in the shot, and didn’t do anything. But it counts as being on television. I worked in a Special Weapons unit, and the tree-huggers would protest, and the stations would come out and film. Because of the job I did, I moved around a lot, while others stood guard. Somehow I ended up in some shots, and some German people I knew told me they saw me on television. Yay!
Side note --- do you know the best way to save a tree? Kill a tree hugger and use the body for fertilizer!!
Angola:
I was on television twice in Angola. The first was for a visit by the Deputy Chief of Staff for the European Command. He flew into visit the Angolan military, and his wife came with him. It was acceptable, as he has to pay all of her costs out of pocket. There is also an expectation that she will do a Humanitarian Assistance project while she is there. She brought a bunch of toys and medicine and medical equipment for a pediatrics hospital we had helped to refurbish. I was her official escort for the visit, as my boss was escorting the General (there were only two of us), and we needed to come up with something to do with her. We had some money left over, so I suggested we have her donate that to the hospital while she was there. Everyone seemed to like that idea, and it all went ahead.
Unknown to me, the Public Affairs office had arranged for the local news station to show up and cover it, and do an interview with her. I was just in background shots and tried to stay out of the way as much as possible, and told them ‘not’ to mention my name. Anyhow, the General (the official visitor) got page 6 on the newspaper, and his wife got the lead story on the 10:00 news. The General’s wife was happy, the General was happy, my boss was happy, and I was happy when the aide came up and said, ‘The General’s wife is happy. What do you need? Give me a list?’ Happy days. Because when the General's wife is happy, we're all happy.
The second time was at a fundraiser the President’s wife gave for a children’s charity. $100 a pop for tickets. I went, and took a date. We had a good time, the wine was flowing, the band was playing, ‘other things’ were going to happen, and we started dancing. We were doing some pretty good swing dancing, and there was hardly anyone else dancing, and we stayed out there quite a while. So for some reason we ended up getting more air time for the story than the President’s wife. My own little ‘Band Stand’ moment.
Latvia:
There wasn’t really a lot of television time in Latvia. We did have the biggest NATO exercise in the history of the Baltics going on, and I was in on the planning for that. I ran a lot of it. We had visiting dignitaries at times, and a NATO Chiefs of Staff summit while I was there. Actually, the Latvians really ran those, but I was heavily involved and ran the American portion of things. Mostly I was on while they were there filming the big shots, and was the guy telling the aide to tell the big shot that it was time to stop talking to the press and get on with the next meeting. No big deal, as far as the television stuff. A big deal as far as the summit.
Slovenia:
A great country. Not as great as Latvia, but still great. I was there for a NATO-integration meeting, and we had a day to kill while we waited on our flights. A bunch of went into the city square and did some sight-seeing and shopping. There was a television crew doing man on the street interviews. They asked me, but I don’t speak Slovenian or Russian, or any of the other common languages, and my German isn’t good enough for that kind of thing, so I declined. A couple of the others did it, and there were shots of me in the background. We watched it on the news that night at the hotel. That was it, really.
So the big break I was talking about?
While working at the hotel in Rapid City, we would get most of the entertainment acts that came into town. They would play the Convention Center, and until they built a hotel next door to it, we were the closest place to stay. A week before the Ice Capades came into town, the advance lady came in and stayed at the hotel. She was going to address the City Council that night and needed someone to go with her and wear the costume representing the show. My boss suggested me, as I was big enough to wear the suit, and would be available. I was asked, and agreed and went down to the council. We went into the meeting, handed out flyers, I shook hands with all the council members and the Mayor, and the crowd, and got a big cheer. The news channels were there and filmed it all for the 10:00 news.
What part did I play, you might ask?
Poppa Smurf.
Yup, the original Blue Man himself.
I’m not claiming any type of fame off of this. It’s more timing or circumstances than anything else. In the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t really mean anything, and I haven’t gone out of my way to be on television. In some cases, I’ve went out of my way to avoid it. I don’t care for the media, and think they are mostly hacks who sensationalize everything for ratings, and don’t really care about the real story. It was a couple of interviews, a couple of game shows, my own little ‘Band Stand’ moment, and just being where they needed someone at the time. Some long shots and just shots where I happened to be in the picture. Which also includes my great acting job. I’ll break them down by country.
United States:
The first time I was on television was back in 1975, when my mother won a slot on ‘Bowling for Dollars’. My two brothers, myself and a friend of my older brother went with her for the taping. It wasn’t that big of a deal. You stand up and they introduce the family members. It was taped, so I got to watch it at home when it aired.
When I got out of college, I moved to Rapid City, South Dakota, and got a job at the Hilton, in the banquet department. We would do some of the main events in town, and the news crews would come down at times to do interviews, or get shots, or whatever it is they do. I got to know them, mostly because there were only two channels in town at the time. They would do some extras at the end of the interview, like filming the buffet, or things like that. Every once in awhile, they would ask me to add a comment or make a remark about something. It was all silly, and pointless, but it happened several times.
This would lead to my big break later. More on that at the end.
I was on television a couple of other times in the states that actually kind of meant something. The first of those was at the end of Desert Storm. I got lucky and was on the first plane out and back to the states. We landed at Fort Stewart, Georgia. There was going to be a big ceremony, obviously, but not for me and the guys I was with. We were stationed at Fort Leonard Wood, Missouri, and had to catch a connecting flight. While they were getting everything set up, they decided to take us out the back door of the plane and get us out of the way so the ceremony could go on at the front door, for the soldiers stationed there.
We didn’t really care, we were just ready to go home. I was sitting by the back door, and when they opened it, I was the first one out because I was the closest. CNN thought that was the start of the ceremony, so they started filming. So I was the first soldier filmed landing back in the states after the fighting was over. I didn’t even know it. My aunt told me about it. She thought it was me, and a friend called and asked her about it, but she said it couldn’t be me, because I was still in Iraq. We hadn’t had a chance to call anyone and tell them we were on the way home. It was only a few weeks later that we figured out what happened.
The other time I was on television was when I was at Fort Campbell, Kentucky, during Somalia and Kosovo, and other operations. I volunteered to go to all of them, but they wouldn’t let me go. They said I was too valuable where I was at. Yeah, right. Anyhow, I was running the MARS station, which was a radio station/message center for the troops. We were able to do radio/phone patches so the troops could call home from overseas.
I’ll leave it at saying we did a lot of good work. If anyone is interested, give me your e-mail address and I’ll send you what happened. Anyhow, we started to get some publicity for what we were doing. We started on the back page of the weekly post paper, then started moving up page by page every week. Finally, I got a call one day from the Sergeant Major telling me to get to his office. He threw the paper and told me to explain myself. I was a little nervous until I looked at it and realized he was giving me crap. We were the top story on front page, above the fold. Pretty cool, if you ask me.
The next day, the Colonel ran into me picking up the distribution, called me into his office and showed me the front page of the Clarksville Leaf-Chronicle, where we were once again top story above the fold. In full color. We were all pretty happy and proud of ourselves. Then the next day, the Sergeant Major called down to the station and asked if we all had proper haircuts. I replied that we did, and asked why. He explained that one of the stations from Nashville had seen the story and was on the way up to interview us. Lead story, 6:00 news, and third on the 10:00 news. Let’s just say that everyone from the Post Commander on down was very happy with us. I still have a tape of the interview somewhere, and will need to get it transferred to CD. Neeve might want to see it someday.
Also, while stationed at Fort Lewis, Washington, I did some part-time security work for the Tacoma Dome, the Seattle Mariners, and a few other places. We would also be seen in the long shots, but enough that people would mention that they had seen me. Oddly, the most time I ever spent on television was 12 consecutive hours, at the Seattle International Speedway, working the start line for drag racing. I was on ESPN all day, and no one knew it was me. Mostly because I was wearing sunglasses and a ball cap, and they couldn't recognize me. Oh, well.
South Korea:
Germany should have been next, chronologically, but I wrote it like this originally, so it will stay. I was actually on television several times in South Korea, to include the Armed Forces Network and Korean television. The Koreans are very supportive of their military, and have game and talk shows geared exclusively to them. It’s kind of nice to see. They don’t just use the military to bump the ratings when something bad has happened, then turn around and shed a tear when public opinion is high. Anyhow, I was walking down the street in Seoul, and a television crew stopped me and asked if I would help them out. They were doing a segment where someone would say things in English, and the contestant would try and guess what the subject was. It wasn’t a big deal to me, and I like to support this kind of thing, so I said okay, not thinking much of it. It aired the next Sunday, and all of a sudden I was a huge star. Every Korean I met for 2 weeks told me they had seen me on television and how much they appreciated me supporting their military by doing that. Yeah, sure.
The other time I was on television in South Korea was on the Armed Forces Network. My roommate was ‘dating’ one of the girls who worked there, and she would come out with crews to do interviews and on the spot report type of things. Whenever she would see me, she would always get me in the shot, or get me to say something for the spot they were doing. Nothing big, but other people didn’t get to do it. People would actually come up to me and ask me if I worked for the Network, and if I could get them on camera. Yeah, don't think so.
Germany:
There wasn’t much to it in Germany. I was just in the shot, and didn’t do anything. But it counts as being on television. I worked in a Special Weapons unit, and the tree-huggers would protest, and the stations would come out and film. Because of the job I did, I moved around a lot, while others stood guard. Somehow I ended up in some shots, and some German people I knew told me they saw me on television. Yay!
Side note --- do you know the best way to save a tree? Kill a tree hugger and use the body for fertilizer!!
Angola:
I was on television twice in Angola. The first was for a visit by the Deputy Chief of Staff for the European Command. He flew into visit the Angolan military, and his wife came with him. It was acceptable, as he has to pay all of her costs out of pocket. There is also an expectation that she will do a Humanitarian Assistance project while she is there. She brought a bunch of toys and medicine and medical equipment for a pediatrics hospital we had helped to refurbish. I was her official escort for the visit, as my boss was escorting the General (there were only two of us), and we needed to come up with something to do with her. We had some money left over, so I suggested we have her donate that to the hospital while she was there. Everyone seemed to like that idea, and it all went ahead.
Unknown to me, the Public Affairs office had arranged for the local news station to show up and cover it, and do an interview with her. I was just in background shots and tried to stay out of the way as much as possible, and told them ‘not’ to mention my name. Anyhow, the General (the official visitor) got page 6 on the newspaper, and his wife got the lead story on the 10:00 news. The General’s wife was happy, the General was happy, my boss was happy, and I was happy when the aide came up and said, ‘The General’s wife is happy. What do you need? Give me a list?’ Happy days. Because when the General's wife is happy, we're all happy.
The second time was at a fundraiser the President’s wife gave for a children’s charity. $100 a pop for tickets. I went, and took a date. We had a good time, the wine was flowing, the band was playing, ‘other things’ were going to happen, and we started dancing. We were doing some pretty good swing dancing, and there was hardly anyone else dancing, and we stayed out there quite a while. So for some reason we ended up getting more air time for the story than the President’s wife. My own little ‘Band Stand’ moment.
Latvia:
There wasn’t really a lot of television time in Latvia. We did have the biggest NATO exercise in the history of the Baltics going on, and I was in on the planning for that. I ran a lot of it. We had visiting dignitaries at times, and a NATO Chiefs of Staff summit while I was there. Actually, the Latvians really ran those, but I was heavily involved and ran the American portion of things. Mostly I was on while they were there filming the big shots, and was the guy telling the aide to tell the big shot that it was time to stop talking to the press and get on with the next meeting. No big deal, as far as the television stuff. A big deal as far as the summit.
Slovenia:
A great country. Not as great as Latvia, but still great. I was there for a NATO-integration meeting, and we had a day to kill while we waited on our flights. A bunch of went into the city square and did some sight-seeing and shopping. There was a television crew doing man on the street interviews. They asked me, but I don’t speak Slovenian or Russian, or any of the other common languages, and my German isn’t good enough for that kind of thing, so I declined. A couple of the others did it, and there were shots of me in the background. We watched it on the news that night at the hotel. That was it, really.
So the big break I was talking about?
While working at the hotel in Rapid City, we would get most of the entertainment acts that came into town. They would play the Convention Center, and until they built a hotel next door to it, we were the closest place to stay. A week before the Ice Capades came into town, the advance lady came in and stayed at the hotel. She was going to address the City Council that night and needed someone to go with her and wear the costume representing the show. My boss suggested me, as I was big enough to wear the suit, and would be available. I was asked, and agreed and went down to the council. We went into the meeting, handed out flyers, I shook hands with all the council members and the Mayor, and the crowd, and got a big cheer. The news channels were there and filmed it all for the 10:00 news.
What part did I play, you might ask?
Poppa Smurf.
Yup, the original Blue Man himself.
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