Not a good sign

I was supposed to have some temporary work this week, for a couple of days, at a local hospital. But they called me this morning and told me it had been filled internally, and I wouldn't be needed. I don't have any reason not to believe them, but its not a good sign.

I can still give it a couple of weeks of looking for something permanent, but all the agencies I've spoken to think I will have a hard time finding something. They all suggest I work a series of temp jobs until I can get established and better known in the area.

I really want something permanent, because it will help when it comes to renting a place. But I guess I might have to go for the temp stuff if nothing comes up. Problem is, none of it really pays very well. And its expensive over here.

I was hoping for around $4000 a month. Now that might seem like a lot, but consider a decent 2-bedroom, furnished apartment will cost at least $1500 a month. And I'm not talking about the Ritz. Add another $300 a month for utilities. $300 a month for food. I don't know how much insurance is yet. I'm afraid to ask. And eventually buying a car, and insurance for that. And gas at $9 a gallon. And another $600 or so for child support. It all adds up in a hurry. So I don't think I was being unreasonable. And I've seen plenty of jobs listed for that salary.

And I had to sell everything, so I've got to buy all new stuff. Pots, pans, linens, towels, dishes, TV, glassess, everything. And as I said, its expensive, so it won't come cheap.

But according to the agencies, they're having a hard time finding something because of my age (43) and because my experience doesn't translate well from the American military to something useful in the UK.

I'll find something. I know I will. And I'll end up with a second job. I've done that a good portion of my adult life. I was expecting that, regardless. And except for the times I have my daughter, it doesn't really matter to me how I fill the time. I've got my military retirement, so that will help. But I've got bills from the states that have to be paid off. Mostly the credit cards from all the trips over here. And I had to sell my truck at a loss, so I'm still paying on that. If I can make it a year, and get those taken care of, I'll be fine.

I'll be fine, no matter what. And I've only been at this a week. I'm just impatient to get something. The main issue is having enough money for me to find a suitable place for my daughter to come stay with me. I'm fine in a shared house, going cheap. But I won't bring her here, and her mother wouldn't let me, anyhow. But I'm getting to know a few people who live in the neighborhood. Local people always know about places, so I'm listening to anything and everyone.

But its out there. Something will come along. I'm not really a religious person, and the praying thing doesn't seem to work with me. I'm not a big believer in fate, or destiny, or predetermination either. No rolls of the dice for me. But I can't believe that I would get over here and be this close to having what I've worked at for so long, and then fail. Somehow, someway, whatever system works, will provide.

Right?